OntariOH NO

What’s this? Two posts in two days? I better slow my roll, I don’t want anybody getting the idea that I’m competent, or anything.

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Ruh-roh.

Whenever smug Canadians point out that electing a craven hard-right populist like Donald Trump could NEVER happen in Canada due to, I dunno, niceness, or smug superiority, or something, this election will serve as a constant reminder to them that they’re full of shit.

The Ontario provincial election has come and gone, and, as one would expect from a voter turnout of, as of Thursday night, about 57%, it went about as well as I predicted. Which is to say that everything is fucked.

(For my election preview, click here.)

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ONTARIO ELECTIONWATCH 2018

(Featured image from TVO)

For most of the last two months, the upcoming Ontario election has kind of been a representative microcosm of how most timelines of recent elections in the “Western world” (for lack of a less exclusionary term) have progressed:

  1.  Phenomenally unpopular, uninspiring centrist status-quo government exists, as the right-wing opposition salivates in anticipation for the chance to knock them off.
  2. Right-wing opposition presents “populist” candidate and/or platform that offends every moral sensibility held by decent people.
  3. Right-wing opposition gets incredibly popular anyways on the basis of “not being the phenomenally unpopular centrist status-quo government.”
  4. Right-wing opposition pulls ahead in polls, unhindered by smug, matter-of-fact contentions from the phenomenally unpopular centrist status-quo government.
  5. The election happens.
  6. ???
  7. Everything continues to be shitty.

These story beats are all-too noticeable when examining the lead-up to tomorrow’s Ontario general election between the incumbent Liberal Party , the Progressive Conservative Party, and the New Democratic Party. However, the race has gotten unexpectedly competitive as of late, and there are some added quirks thrown into this particular linear path towards the inevitable violent overthrow of the ruling class that make a post worth everybody’s time. And by “quirks,” I mean oh my God, they’re going to elect Doug Ford, aren’t they?

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Quick Hits Episode 5: A Brief, Yet Triumphant Return

(Featured image from CBC)

We are all Xavier Trudeau/Nous sommes tous Xaver Trudeau.

Because I can’t understand steel tariffs, and because¬†of the torrent of anger and vitriol that Colten Boushie case stirs up inside of me, we’re going to start with the literal least important possible thing to happen in the last couple weeks: Prime Minister Justin Trudeau’s surreal visit to India for a state visit and meeting with Indian Prime Minister Narendra Modi.

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